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Medusa~ Goddess of Transformation

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As I was ballin looking for a profile picture to snap shot my sentiment I came across the Goddess Medusa. The pain in her eyes is all so familiar to me. The Goddess of Transformation is what I typed in the search engine, as I am transforming as I type,  and stumbled upon Medusa. She was once a beautiful priestess with golden locks. A virgin vowed to celibacy. She fell in love with Poseidon and married him, is how one version of the story goes. Others say Poseidon raped her in Athena’s temple because he couldn’t resist her beauty. Athena was furious that she broke her vow and turned her hair into snakes, gave her fair skin a green hue, and turned her enchanting eyes into bloodshot death traps. Anyone who looked into her eyes turned into stone.  Disgust and repulsion struck the hearts of  all who laid eyes on her less than desirable appearance. She fled to Africa ashamed of her appearance , and restlessly wandered until one day her insides were transformed to reflect that of her outside.Thus Medusa was Created.

My wheels got to spinning as I sat in my car ruminating about her and how she was a product 1) of her choices; the choice to break her vow between herself and her Spiritual Team {for love of a God} or Her circumstances {being Raped by a God} 2) the harsh and bitter opinions and treatment she received from others & 3) her self loathing and lack of self love due to her undesirable appearance.

First, Medusa was a Mortal priestess who made a vow to remain a virgin. According to the first version of her story, she broke her vow, compromised her Integrity being charmed by a man. Not just a man, a God. She forgot her VOW as a Priestess and married a God. Deep. A Priestess is a woman who officiates Sacred Rites. Sacred Rites are practices used to venerate {one or many}  Deities.  She is the female equivalent of a Priest.  She was a Priestess in the Temple of Athena. Athena is the Goddess of wisdom, courage, inspiration, civilization, law and justice, strategic warfare, mathematics, strength, strategy, the arts, crafts, and skill. So in Medusa’s burning desire for this God her sacred duty flew out of the window. She folded and married the man, meaning they consummated, she allowed him inside of her sacred space. If we go by the second version of the story, she was a vain maiden flaunting her beauty left to right, so much so that Poseidon had to have her and wouldn’t accept no for an answer. She fled to Athena’s temple thinking she’d be safe. Little did she know Poseidon could care less. He forced himself inside of her and she conceived. Once Athena got wind of the fact that Medusa had sex,  Athena punished her, letting Poseidon off of the hook. It is said that Medusa was punished for her vanity, because she stayed flaunting her beauty. Wha?! What part of the game is that? Medusa was punished for being raped? Wait, wha? Naturally, I wanted to know the relationship between Athena and Poseidon. They weren’t even cool like that. I would even argue that he did what he did to retaliate against Athena and Medusa just so happened to get caught up in the cross fire. Damn Shame!

Second, Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. As a result of her actions her appearance was changed to that of a monster that was abhorred by all who witnessed her detestable figure. As a woman whose body is reconfigured beyond recognition, which could have been a very beautiful thing if the outcome was desirable, it must have been extremely challenging to readjust.  It caused her to retreat, run away, and hide so that she wouldn’t be subject to the harsh judgment of people outside of herself. On top of that if any of the onlookers caught a glimpse of her eyes they were immediately turned into stone. Kiss intimacy Buh-Bye. She couldn’t even receive that undeniable truth that ONLY the windows of the soul {the eyes} speak. Can you imagine that? Your whole body is changed for the worse. You can’t stand the sight of you and neither can the whole wide world. In the pain and despair in your search for someone to relate to, or to comfort you, or just listen to you, you soon realize that by looking into the gateway of their soul, these potential healers turn into stone. Your piercing gaze transforms them into stone!!!! Wow. That’s heavy.

It goes without saying that self love, appreciation, honor, and care is non existent for her at this point. In fact those healthy practices, beliefs and attitudes took a swing onto the other end of the pendulum. Now there is self loathing, self hatred, and torment. She has internalized the fears projected onto her from others that she triggered by her new figure which she got due to her compromising her Integrity for the love of a God. OR which she got for her own vanity. Wow! She was then fully transformed from within with the power to transform people into sculpted art.

So I’m ballin my eyes out thinking wow!!! This is how women end up turning cold. Ultimately, The very Goddess she revered cut her off, turning her into a beast. OUCH!!!! She worshipped this Goddess and was a priestess in her temple!!!! WHAT THE FUCK!!!! My pain  is transformative pain. The pain. Where is the pain coming from? Me compromising my integrity. Regardless if I only compromise a little bit or a lotta bit, compromise is still comprise and there are dire consequences for jeopardizing my integrity period. This is my relationship with me. In my attempt to please or appease another out side of myself and my integrity, EVEN IF ITS A GOD or GODDESS, separates me from my self. Not only does it separate me from myself, there are consequences that may change the course of my destiny. What I’m saying is, the goal I aspire to attain by compromising myself will fail, period.

Aside from the self inflicted pain due to poor decision making/Vanity, is the opinion of the people. The people were disgusted by the look of her. Here is this once beautiful Priestess now in a detestable body. She wasn’t being rejected for her ugly attitude or her character, she was rejected for her lack of beauty. Not only was she rejected for her absence of beauty, she was subjected to every ones negative opinion about her until their opinions of her became her reality.

I battle with this when I’m going through life changing challenges. After I sort through my emotions and begin deciding what I desire, I think about how people will perceive my challenge, the way I handle it, and the other parties involved {if any}. If I am not careful this can spin off in a bajillion directions, so I must actively stop my thoughts from firing off with the opinions of people outside of me, especially since its all hypothetical anyway {at this point}. This task was once nearly impossible given my need please people. I am still classy and diplomatic, as I am an expression of Divine Feminine Grace. So I do consider those outside of myself directly involved when moving forward. If it’s one thing I’ve learned on my journey, it’s that when you hear something positive or negative about yourself repeated enough times it will take root in your mind and heart and begin growing. Faith comes from hearing. So you hear something long enough you will begin to believe it, EVEN IF the voice you hear is your own assuming what others will say. The seed will grow. So with that I make it a point to keep people at as far out of my creation process within reason. I know what it’s like to internalize someone else’s  negative opinion of me and that doesn’t feel good at all. I can see how easy it is to slip away and lose your True self. Been there done that. Now I know what I choose period, and I choose to make my decisions free of the opinions of most people. I still have a council of Wise Women who I will run things by if need be. Lately though my Wise council has been deep within myself with my Spiritual Team. And even so, they are pushing me to tap into my knowing without depending so much on them, instead relying on ME, Warrior Empress.

Internalizing the negative opinions of the outsiders caused Medusa to flee. During all that time she wandered in Africa can you Imagine what was going on in her mind? I can tell you this, through that tug of war she chose to transform into a beast. While in my car thinking about all this in my mind I let out the biggest shriek of anguish bordering wrath. I did that. I put myself in her place and I shrieked the loudest most passionate shriek expressing the anger with Athena, Poseidon, the people and Myself. I felt her and all of the women who choose to embody the Beast or that destructive wrathful Power we possess inside, and and those who stay in that angry wrathful energetic space. Especially after being impregnated as a result of rape and the perpetrator gets off scott free. Makes me wonder.

My Inquiring mind wonders if Goddess Athena might have been jealous. I just don’t see how Poseidon got away without any type of punishment or retaliation, especially because Athena is the Goddess of Strategic Warfare. It would totally make sense with the first version of the story, she turning Poseidon’s wife into a monster. The second story though? Maybe she was pissed because it goes without saying that Poseidon is a rival and she must of felt Medusa, being her flamboyant self, lured him into her temple {of all places} to break her vow of celibacy. That’ll make a Goddess DESTROY EVERYTHING!!! What’s even more is being CUT OFF from a GODDESS you give offerings to {whatever those offerings may be} without warning is the ULTIMATE BETRAYAL. Don’t do me like that!!!!!!

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